I cannot seem to manage to step into the 21st century and post a link to someone's web page. So, if you're reading this, please stop reading and go to:http://www.timmollen.com/humor_column/humor_column.html
...then read that for awhile. He is funny. He will make you laugh... or he will make you a sandwich. You have nothing to lose.
Then, come back here. I've decided to start writing again.
Or, forward the sandwich. I'm hungry.